Dismissive Attitudes: Oh your ignoring me? Here, let me help you

(Note: I wrote this over a week ago. Two days later i came across a similar situation AGAIN so this recently applys, although in the moment it didnt.)

First I just want to say, its never felt so good to be in my feelings, express them, and move on with my day. This blog is like therapy for me. The last blog I posted helped me to not dwell on it. I keep so much bottled up, and writing about my experience gave me freedom I dont usually feel. So today I am in my feelings again.

I couldnt figure out for the life of me why It always feels like I am being ignored, why I may comment on things and people intentionally ignore me. Do these people have something against me? Whats the issue? Did I kill ya cat or dog? Hell hit me up and let me know! I always feel dismissed. Even when im talking I feel like im always fighting to get my words out, especially around more out going extrovert people. My first mind is to help you ignore me. I get ghost, i must admit I can take a hint like no other, and If I start to feel dismissed you will more than likely never hear from me again. Since High School ive made it a point for people to know I wont follow behind them like a lost puppy craving attention, i'd rather stay to myself than kiss butt. Ultimately I am easily offended and thought that  people are out to make me feel small and dismissed.

But let's get to the real issue

I realize that its not them, its my insecurities. Half the time people dont realize what their doing. I am so used to the feeling of being dismissed. My shyness never allowed me to command an audience, or the attention i THOUGHT I needed. I grew up around so many loud people, and honestly, my family is only JUST starting to learn me and my opinions. People tell me all the time " Tia I didnt know you were so smart". Im finding my voice so late in life, but the feeling of being dismissed still lingers.

I must be real though, I cant stand dismissive people. Those who dismiss your feelings, your hurt, your emotions all together. Dismissive people are usually very self-centered. Never caring how their actions or words affect others. Ask people who have ever felt suicidal and nine times out of ten they will tell you that they felt they had no one to talk to because their feelings are always dismissed.

Its like if your a child and your used to being told "shut up and stay in a childs place". Then something tragic happens and you are not given the avenue to say how it affected YOU as a child. You grow up thinking your opinion and feelings is invalid. You tell someone "Im not feeling like myself today, I feel down" and someone else says "Girl you'll be okay, I have down days too but I gotta keep it moving". And I really hate to hear "You'll get over it". Folks....please stop telling people that, even if its true, even if this is how you truly feel. Learn to LISTEN, and not listen to hear but Listen to UNDERSTAND.

Honestly I'm over dismissive people, but I also don't want to be so in my feelings that I mistake a simple over sight as ignoring me. I want to be delivered from being so offended in that, most times people mean well, but i think it is the realist in me that knows people are petty and sometimes are ignoring you, or looking past you because they dont see you as important. Its hard to figure out which is which, but that really isnt my job. My job is to be so secure in myself and who I am that I no longer feel dismissed or ignored.  

The introvert in me has created a shell that causes me to put up a wall when I feel dismissed, but people are just.....people. They are not Jesus, they are not obligated to consider or hear out my feelings or give me attention. It would be awesome to let alot of things just roll off my shoulder as if it never happened....easier said than done. I am praying for that deliverance